Fear

When we get to the lowest place in our life, when we are sure there is no way out, we reach a place where there is no fear....... we have given up and we are in a place with no limits, only possibilities, while we search for the next step.

People often find Faith for the first time when in this "low" place, stripped of "everything."  The art of living with Spirit, with Guidance, is to get to the place of no fear and no limits before having to be brought to our knees, to the lowest place. The art of surrender is not the art of giving up when we are down and out, but instead to become open to options before we are brought to our knees.

I have worked with people who have had a true nervous breakdown when life became everything they ever wanted. Why ? Fear. Now they have more to lose than ever before-- the perfect career, a wonderful relationship, big income, precious child, amazing house, etc. When people struggle, any light at the end of the tunnel is a gift. When we are at the bottom, all we can think about is the next step to take to survive, or get out. There is nothing to lose, only gains to be made. Loss can bring us to living in the now. But is that the only way ?

How do we live as if there is only gains to be made, as if each moment is okay ?

New age platitudes have the right spirit, but the actual practice is quite different. If it were so easy to live in the moment, with surrender,  we wouldn't see the growth of industries based on motivating others to keep going.  And sadly so many industries flourish that tell people "if you do this ______(fill in the blank), you will get this __________ (fill in the blank).  And thousands of dollars later.......

What if we don't "want" anything?  What if we instead observe what we DO have. What if we develop the super power of Yin-- wait. Allow. Contemplate. Accept. Celebrate each step and each moment that comes because you cannot see what if there will even be a next moment.

Who learns to do this ? Those with fatal diseases. Those that have lived through hurricanes and super storms. Those that have children with disabilities. War veterans. Spiritual seekers with a strong practice and discipline.

For most of  us, living in the Now is an art form. It is a lifestyle that takes ongoing attention-- like eating healthy or taking care of your body.

Drinking, over eating, obsessions,creating illnesses through poor lifestyle choices, smoking, addictions in general, are all ways to keep one in the "present". Addictions keep one in the "now" each moment is focused on how to handle the addiction and keep it going (how to hide it, how to feed it, how to manage the bad feelings created and the symptoms etc.). Stopping addictions allow the fear -- of the present --to surface......again......

Addictions take work and addicts work hard to maintain their addictions. They might not think so-- but if they take a closer look at the amount of time and energy spent on everything related to the addictions (buying, doing, recovering, doctor appointments, health issues that ruin the.... day), they will see addiction is a second career (sometimes a first career).

One way to lose an addiction is to squeeze it out, replace it, with something better.  That way there is less of a sense of loss and more desire created to go after the new "addiction."  

What if one changes the addiction to a practice that cultivates the Self and higher energies (meditation, yoga, tai chi, chi gong, etc)   It takes the same amount (or less) of work. It is legal. Best of all......life gets better instead of worse (addictions always take us down hill).  And we end up "addicted" to Balance, Living in the Now, and Guidance.