Emotional Labor
Emotional Labor People want help but at the same time they are terrified of change. Their hurt ways “work” and the pain is familiar. It is so familiar, they are no longer even conscious that their hurt ways that work, are still choices. And choices can change. Hurt people have learned to protect themselves at all costs. This means manipulation instead of directness, hiding until all is determined to be “safe”, blaming to avoid being punished, never making a decision because it might be the “wrong” one so you are always looking for “clues” so you can guess at how you think you are “supposed” to act and kill before you are killed, again. It is a whole system that has taken years, decades, to construct and perfect. You might have even found someone to marry that works within your system meant to keep you “safe”. When you seek help, a therapist, a Teacher, a healer, you will also be searching for someone to keep you safe validate your reality becau