Life as an Actor

Life as an Actor

"Actors are some of the most driven, courageous people on the face of the earth. They deal with more day-to-day rejection in one year than most people do in a lifetime. Every day, actors face the financial challenge of living a freelance lifestyle, the disrespect of people who think they should get real jobs, and their own fear that they'll never work again. Every day, they have to ignore the possibility that the vision they have dedicated their lives to is a pipe dream. With every passing year, many of them watch as the other people their age achieve the predictable milestones of normal life - the car, the family, the house, the nest egg. Why? Because actors are willing to give their entire lives to a moment - to that line, that laugh, that gesture, or that interpretation that will stir the audience's soul. Actors are beings who have tasted life's nectar in that crystal moment when they poured out their creative spirit and touched another's heart. In that instant, they were as close to magic, God, and perfection as anyone could ever be. And in their own hearts, they know that to dedicate oneself to that moment is worth a thousand lifetimes.”  -David Ackert, LA Times

I saw this post on Facebook. As a former actor/dancer it made me so sad to read this.  Why? First off, many people go through all of these challenges.  Anyone who chooses an alternative lifestyle, be it gender choices, creative drives, or say if you are a psychic living among muggles faces these same challenges of endless rejection and criticism or rejection because one is living a non-traditional lifestyle. Additionally, many people face rejection and criticism of their lifestyle because they are not physically attractive, have a low IQ, have Down’s syndrome or Autism, or are racially or religiously unacceptable in the area they have been forced to live as children and are now stuck in as adults. This doesn’t even touch people who are refugees, or survivors of a war zone or torture who are now struggling to appear normal in a society untouched by these kinds of traumas.  Many people are heavily criticized, rejected, humiliated and more because of their “pipe dream.”  In fact it is the American dream story we so often see in movies--- the underdog with a “pipe dream” makes it.  For actors to claim this as “their” courageous journey when so many struggle to be the first in their family to go to college, or start a business etc. , or recover from war to build a fortune, etc., to me,  reduces actors to the silly egocentric narcissists that they are so often portrayed to be.  It reminds me of the joke of a person who goes on a date with an actor who talks incessantly about his/her self, then says “Enough about me. What do you think about me?”  Sigh.  I get to say this because I was in that industry for years.

Actors are not the only ones who desire to live deeply and experience a "crystal moment" and to be able to taste “ ... life's nectar in that crystal moment when they poured out their creative spirit and touched another's heart. In that instant, they were as close to magic, God, and perfection as anyone could ever be. And in their own hearts, they know that to dedicate oneself to that moment is worth a thousand lifetimes”. Many other people have experienced this drive, and in fact many others are able to achieve these “moments” a greater percentage of the time and with much more sacrifice in order to do so, than actors, for example, the Dalai Lama. In fact, dedicated therapists, teachers, Shamans, Medicine People, Healers, etc. seek, create, and deliver “ crystal moments” every day of their life, with no award ceremonies, and no applause. How sad that this quote portrays actors who have a need to deliver “moments” to strangers (the audience) and yet cannot or will not make the effort to do this in their daily lives with their mate, children, parents, best friends.  How many actors have I heard say they only truly feel alive when pursuing these “moments” ... sadly, not in their lives, on a daily basis, but only in their work. If I was a family member, I would weep, especially as so much of the life of an actor is about commercials, cop shows, soap operas, etc. How can you justify choosing to pursue those roles in the hopes of eventually having a “moment” when someone (or many someone’s) you love are in front of your face, longing to have “moments” with you.  Don’t their stories matter? Doesn’t your life story rate a top performance as well?

A great deal of our culture actually wishes for this connection, “the crystal moment,” the feeling of truly touching others, touching others’ hearts, “stirring the soul”, being deeply touched by moments in life. Spiritual bankruptcy is rampant right now.  People feel disconnected, irrelevant, powerless, lack dreams and vision (other than those cheap thrills portrayed on television and in movies) and many drink, take meds, cheat in committed relationships, hurt each other and themselves as dysfunctional ways of pursuing the thrill of “a moment.”

Why don’t actors (in fact all of us) pursue the richness of their own daily life and seek to create those “crystal moments” for themselves and their loved ones instead of just an audience of strangers? Is the adoration of strangers what is needed and craved as opposed to the deep and ongoing connection to real people in your life?  Is it you don’t get paid to be in your own life?  Is it too much work, too little belief or interest in the Self?  The answer is different for each individual; however a place to start is to ask questions, to become curious about your choices. This is what Mindfulness is all about. Like an actor becoming curious about the person they are portraying, digging deep to “become” that person, to discover the heart of the story and bringing that to life, the practice of Mindfulness does exactly that, except you do it for YOU, your life, the players in your life, your story and all those hearts and souls affected by your story… and by you. And there is a great deal of real life clinical and peer reviewed research that validates the reality of how Mindfulness practice is capable of healing one’s issues and igniting one’s life force energy.

Mindfulness means bringing your Self fully, totally completely, with all senses involved, into the present moment. It is an art form, one of desire, commitment and focus. As you brush your teeth, you smell the minty sharp odor; feel the texture of the paste, the friction of the brush, the stretch of your lips, the foam on your tongue. Suddenly brushing your teeth is a journey, sensory, engulfing, a “moment.” If your child happens to be watching, s/he could be touched, moved, to also brush his/her teeth. Or your spouse could walk by and be caught in the energy of your experience, and come over and add a kiss to the “moment” because you are present, open, and willing instead of distracted and not-present. Living with Mindfulness, is Life on Fire, filled with endless moments of illumination. So much so, that audition outcomes (if you are an actor) become just another experience in your playbook, like living through a storm or other weather, rather than an interpretation of “rejection” and struggle, which is a story with left brain interpretation. Mindfulness teaches and encourages us to be “in” each experience, not to make up a story about what it means. Stories, interpretations, are created by the ego, the left brain, the childish, self-serving, attention seeking, lower body part of our human consciousness.

When one is in the energy of being Mindful, others are attracted to that energy, that life force, like hummingbirds to flowers. Mindfulness puts one in the “flow” of Spirit and that truly touches others, their heart, and their soul. When we are fully present, we are open, and emanating an energy that makes us and others feel fully alive and it is in these encounters that we bring a tear of love to someone’s face. It is in that “moment” we can say something deeply moving to another that they might change the course of their life and make other choices. It is that “moment” that we create, by choosing to be Mindful, when life becomes Magic. Magic, magical, epic, engaging, life changing, soul moving, heart stirring “moment”, no script, just You, fully present, fully engaged, fully living, fully giving. Not for the paycheck or the adoration magic. Not to tell someone else’s story magic. It is magic you create, from your heart and from your soul and share, which changes the world, starting with your world.   

This is the life of Mindfulness. It takes discipline and practice and tons of failure (just like acting) and while there is no Oscar or Emmy from strangers, there are the amazing and unbelievable rewards of living your life as an epic undertaking (instead of something you have to tolerate between jobs), filled with "crystal moments", touching the lives of those around you, and setting your Soul on Fire. .  Choose Mindfulness. Practice it. Live it. Live the story of Your Life.  Every day, not just when you get hired to do so.   Want some more information on Mindfulness? Read here.

Journey on.