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Showing posts from 2018

"Handling" People

“Handling” People When people “handle” me, it makes my skin crawl, literally. Why do people “handle” others? What is the difference between say being diplomatic with someone, being professional, or having boundaries all of which are healthy behaviors compared to “handling” someone? The simple answer is energy. Handling someone means you are a closed book, you have an agenda with a person and you want that agenda whether it is to get something from the person or you wish to make that person go away (without you simply setting a boundary or being honest). This is a short article and will only begin to touch on this subject which is really very complex. If what you read sparks something in you, get some help. You cannot work on this by yourself. People who “handle” others often do not know that is what they are doing; it is their unconscious “go to” behavior, their norm. Some ways of discovering if you are “handling” versus “relating” to someone is to look at your other choice

How to Follow Guidance

  How to Follow Guidance Self-care or selfless service?   Hold someone accountable (set boundaries, talk it out etc.) or “live and let live”?   Fight for a relationship or let it go? Take action or wait? Follow your dream or get real and pay your bills?   Say “it’s in my chart”   (or you child’s chart) or figure out you are making mistakes and it is “not meant to be”? If only there was one formula. There is! And I have it, online for only $3500. One course you can do in a weekend and you will know what to do and when and in what order so you can get what you want with the least amount of work and stress, just kidding, of course. For those of you who just got a rush reading that intro, you might have a long trail to travel. In reality, there is no one way and there is no life that is stress free which leads one to wonder why stress now has such a bad rap.   Perhaps selling stress as “bad” was created on purpose by the pharmaceutical industry (and now cannabis industry) to in

Be that One Person

Be That One Person Being a “helper” in someone’s life, the (often) one person who believes deeply in you , who “sees” you no matter what your current circumstances are, the person who expects you to be bigger than you are,   the person who helps you see and reach beyond where you are now,   and the one who never leaves you and yet manages to hold his/her own space and not get victimized or abused by your lashing out, these are the actions and   expressions of Spiritual maturity expressed as universal love.   Universal love and tolerance is not a choice for weenies. It is in fact a hero’s journey. I do not use the words “unconditional love” not only because it is an overused cliché but also because that expression implies a world of hugs, kisses, complements and affirmations, and that is not all that love is.   Those expressions   of love are often the self-gratification addiction of a wounded person who needs to be thanked and adored for giving “love” to someone else and   it i

"Meant to be"? I don't think so.

“Meant to be?” I don’t think so. Whether you have decided you just met your twin flame soul mate, or your heart’s guru, if you are in a hormonal adrenaline rush you are reacting to a chemical high and that high can mean many things.   Actually, your “soul mate” or “guru” love rolls in like a sunrise, many sunrises.   The energy may be strong, but it will definitely be soft, gradual, filled with nuances that you could not even have imagined and therefore could not have “manifested”. It is a love that is revealed to you. Not an energy that traps you in a whirlwind high.   People who rush into the energy traps using “meant to be” as their mantra   then justify the often dramatic ending to these kind of relationships with some new age jargon without examining their own dysfunction, lessons learned, the hidden greed inside of them that caused the addictive response to the “rush” they called “meant to be”. A rush of biochemical reactions means you just fell in love with yourself, y